The Debate Continues

Not last night’s VP debate, but the discussion of whether eHarmony’s purchase of Weddingbee was a good move, and whether Bees with LGBT ties or sympathy should continue to blog for the site.  Mrs. Creampuff, a popular San Francisco-based Bee, has turned in her resignation.   So has Miss Flip Flop, a newer Bee from Orlando who identifies as bisexual.

Past and present Bees have had a LOT to say on the subject.  Here are some comments of note:

Miss Hot Cocoa:

“I will not cede power to EHarmony to define what a Weddingbee or a wedding should be, and I genuinely fear that if all of us who support the queer community go, that’s precisely what will happen. The moment EHarmony starts to censor our blogs is the moment I will go. But so long as Bee is committed to providing an open forum, I will continue to use this open (and well-attended) forum to express my support of the queer community and to challenge the heteronormativity of the wedding industrial complex.”

Mrs. Cherry Pie:

“I, too, have felt conflicted about WB’s acquisition by eHarmony. I identify as bisexual and polyamorous, and Mr. CP and I are an active part of Seattle’s kink (leather, queer, poly) community. I wonder how eHarmony would feel about THAT? … Long story short, I do not want to support eHarmony’s discriminative policies. But I don’t really want to leave until I’ve had my say. “

Mrs. Lovebug:

“Weddingbee HAS changed today, massively and fundamentally and irrevocably.”

Mrs. Cookie:

“I too will hold Bee to the promise of maintaining an independent voice that is not censored, and I look forward to the day eharmony changes its policies to be inclusive of the GLBT community. I hope by continuing to blog and tell my story, without censorship, that I can be an instrument for change. “

While I respect Mrs. Bee’s decision to sell her site, I also *greatly* respect the integrity of the Bees who made the choice to leave. This is a tough decision to be sure, and I’m not certain what I’d do in their place. Can you make more of a difference by ‘working from within’ and reaching eHarmony’s audience, or by boycotting the site all together? I don’t know…

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One response to “The Debate Continues

  1. Although I do respect the choice of those bees leaving, I will continue to support Weddingbee and I will stay on board. I honestly believe that there are so many ways to support what you believe in, and no one way is right or wrong.
    Mrs. Ant recently composed a list of ways to support gay rights, and I believe this shows that no one way is better.

    1. Research the subject of gay marriage so you fully understand the rights issue involved and are able to defend it appropriately when communicating with others. It is essential to be well versed on the initiative to legalize same sex marriage in order to effectively promote it.

    2. Write your congressman and other politicians to let them know you support same sex marriages. Well-worded letters directed to those with legislative power can go a long way toward making same sex marriages legal in every state.

    3. Vote for politicians who support same sex marriage. Do your research and find out where each candidate stands in regard to this and other gay rights issues

    4. Sign a petition for same sex marriage. Your single signature may at first seem irrelevant, but among millions change happens.

    5. Donate to organizations that work toward legalizing same sex marriage. These groups need financial backing to allow them to keep fighting for equality in marriage.

    6. Educate others via public forums. Ask to be allowed to speak about gay marriage at local public meetings, such as those conducted by city councils.

    7. Blog thoughtfully about gay marriage. Through the Internet, one person can potentially reach thousands of others. Showing your support in a very personal way can change the hearts and minds of others who may not initially support the cause.

    8. Pen a letter to the editor of the local newspaper. Hopefully your missive will be published for the community’s consideration.

    9. Attend a rally or march supporting same sex marriage. If you are or want to become a leader, organize one yourself in your own community. Be sure to obtain a permit and research the local ordinances regarding the right of assembly.

    10. Watch Gay TV shows. Despite what your parents said, watching television is good for you- especially if you’re gay! By watching gay-theme television shows you increase their ratings. Increased ratings make the high-power networks and advertisers very happy. Hopefully, happy enough that they can’t afford not to have gay programming. Showing Americans gay life on television may also lessen the fear of gay equality.

    11. Volunteer for a Gay Rights organization. There are several organizations that help promote gay rights and safety. Find the one that best suits your lifestyle.

    12. Lobby for gay adoption. The American Bar Association had recently agreed to endorse and lobby states for equal adoption rights for same-sex couples. Join the fight!

    13. Boycott businesses that are not supportive of gay rights. (such as eHarmony)

    14. Write to leaders of business that do not support gay rights. Explain your stance and why you do not support their business. Elaborate on why you think they should adopt a more tolerant policy.

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